Living Life Without Caring

I’ve been recently plagued with my recurring friend, Depression, and being away from home has just made it worse. I’m not one of those people that believes depression is just something you can wish away or something that goes away if you change your mindset. I’ve struggled with it for eight years now, and even when I am at my happiest, depression is always there to remind me that I’ll never be completely free of it.

Now, I say all this because although I do not believe that depression will just go away with the snap of the fingers, I do believe that there are ways to minimize its effects. Two things I have always struggled with since the nightmare that was high school are caring too much about what other people think and comparing myself with others. Yesterday, I decided that I was just going to stop caring what others thought about me (or at least try my hardest to) and stop comparing myself with others, checking myself if I ever did. And you know what? Yesterday I actually felt happy for the first time since I’ve come to Florida.

I stopped caring that there’s a CP clique at my workplace of which I am blatantly excluded, I stopped caring that people might think I’m weird for staring into the distance or for talking to myself, and I stopped comparing how many times I go out with coworkers or friends to how many times my roommates do. I honestly didn’t think it would make much of a difference if I actively tried to not compare myself with others or care what they were thinking, but I felt so carefree yesterday.

I write all of this with the purpose of just letting every person who is introverted; every person with social anxiety; every person who struggles with depression; every person who feels inferior, left-out, ignored–if you make a conscious effort to just stop caring about what other people think of you and to just stop comparing yourself with others, you will feel better about yourself. Every day I feel like a loser who has no friends and doesn’t have her whole life together, but I only feel this way because I view others as being cooler than I am and having their whole lives together, when in reality, they could be just as lost as I am.

To wrap up: stop comparing yourself with others and stop caring what others think about you. Even if you’re not 100% happy after putting this into practice (because let’s face it, who is?), you will still feel at least a little bit happier than you were before, and you’ll also feel a huge weight lifted from your shoulders as the pressure of what you perceive others’ expectations are of you simply fades away.

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